I learnt to properly listen from an early age.  What people were saying, what they weren’t saying.  That the gaps between their words weren’t just there to be filled by my reply.  Giving space for silence is important and a dialogue isn’t like a game of tennis. It has served me well in my work. Recently I’ve been pondering the quiet, often overlooked, role listening plays in my life and I thought I’d share some thoughts to celebrate it!

I have a number of massage clients who live in care homes. Two of them can’t verbally communicate. What I’ve noticed though is that they are still powerful communicators – you just have to take the time to notice. Last time I visited them, for example, they were both agitated. By the end of their treatments one of the ladies couldn’t stop giggling, releasing pent-up emotion, while the other was gently stroking my hand, feeling relaxed after I had calmed her with massage, words and inviting her to mirror my breath. They had needed very different things from their treatments, despite initially seeming to be in the same condition.

Understanding what my clients want and need from their massage is crucial for any massage therapist and the only way to do that is to set your expectations and assumptions aside and listen – both to what people are saying and what they are not saying. It’s all about stopping, being quiet and allowing the communication to happen, without imposing on it.

One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say. Bryant H. McGill

During my Herbal Medicine degree we were taught the importance of an in-depth consultation – and the role listening plays in that. Herbal medicine isn’t a one size fits all approach. Two people presenting with the same symptoms might turn out to need very different treatments, depending on their lifestyle, expectations, diet and medical history. Listening allows me to go deeper, tackling issues at their root rather than the surface level.
The irony is, this year it’s been pointed out to me I’ve failed to listen to myself. All aspects of my work deal with the importance of paying attention, looking after ourselves and treating ourselves well to be at our best and live life the way we want to.

Yet earlier this year, a catalogue of family crises completely derailed me. I was bouncing from one emergency to the next, reacting to each new issue without any pause in between. I knew I was struggling. Good friends spotted I was struggling, but it took driving in a rush to a meeting and thinking I might actually be having a heart attack or a stroke to realise I had to stop and grab my metaphorical oxygen mask before I could be any use trying to help anyone else on this plummeting plane!

A good friend offered me a free place on a yoga workshop – it was only when I properly stopped to relax that I realised just how much of my body hurt! And all the tension I was physically carrying every day. Another good friend offered me a reflexology session and I can honestly say I floated into another dimension for that forty minutes, which left me more relaxed than I had been in months.  I also chatted with a counsellor I know, who as well as listening, prompted me to realise that I had to share how I was feeling with others and I didn’t have to be superwoman!

My circumstances haven’t completely righted themselves (in fact we’ve had some more stresses thrown into the emotional rollercoaster) but that space has given me chance to breathe and make me realise I have to prioritise my self-care or I won’t be able to cope. Which is no good to those around me, let alone myself.

So as part of this celebration of listening, I want to invite you to listen to yourself. Stop, take three deep breaths and notice what’s going on in your body and mind. Where are you carrying tension in your body? What are the thoughts circling in your head?

Self-care is another term for listening to yourself. It doesn’t always look like a hot bath, sometimes it looks like changing your diet, organising childcare or making yourself go for a walk in the rain to get some fresh air.
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If you’ve started to notice you need to build in some time for yourself, I’d love to help. Contact me to talk about how you can start to use herbal medicine (or massage) to listen to and work with your body, to feel better in the long term.
If you get in touch by 30th of October you can take advantage of my Autumn Wellbeing Reboot – 6 weeks to help you listen to your body and make the changes you need. 

"Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand." --Karl A. Menniger

Summer is my favourite time of year. Playtime! The garden is at its most abundant and as a self-employed Medical Herbalist and Massage Therapist I’ve been lucky enough to juggle life and work to spend a lot of the summer months outside.
But I love that ‘new start’ feeling that comes with September. That briskness in the air along with the start of term calls me to look forward. Time to buy some new stationery and make plans.  Dream of what I want to achieve for the rest of the year and into the next year.  And look back at the year so far, see what has worked, what hasn’t and how I’m going to change things.

The perfect time to make changes
While January’s traditionally resolution time, winter isn’t a good time for new starts. September, bursting with nature in full fruit, also heralds change. And hopefully we’re feeling refreshed by the summer and in a much better place to make positive changes.
This year, more than ever, I recognise the importance of taking stock and looking after myself.

I‘ll be honest, I’ve had a shitty year.
What started off really hopeful with some exciting new projects in the pipeline suddenly got railroaded by family ill health and some scary stressful months.  And I lunged from one stress to another reacting to each new issue rather than being able to be pro-active, or take any time for self-care. It was only when friends insisted that I realised I was pushing myself into a wall and had to stop.
So I’ve swapped my September ritual of buying lovely new stationery to getting out foraging for elderberries. I now have a fridge of elderberry syrup full of immune boosting properties ready for the coming months. It’s not too late to make your own – take a look at my recipe.

Time for an Autumn reboot?
It’s as though nature knows it needs to help us out at this time of year. Come the middle to end of September there is always a rush of patients wanting help with coughs, colds, sore throats, and general immune support as all the kids back at school mingle their germs and bring them home to share with the rest of the family.
If, like me, you’re feeling like you want (or need!) to reset your wellbeing this Autumn, I’d love to help you. For a limited time I’m offering an Autumn wellbeing reboot programme, which includes:
A one hour initial consultation, to understand your health, diet and lifestyle
Tailored herbal prescriptions to suit you, as well as lifestyle and self-care recommendations that take account of your needs and preferences
A follow-up consultation to check-in and go deeper if need be
Two further consultations to review progress and ensure any changes are sustainable into the future
Herbal prescriptions adjusted as needed during the course of the programme

This is a fantastic, highly accessible way to reset your health and wellbeing for the long term. Herbs work with your body to make changes from the inside out, so you’re not just responding to the surface symptoms, you’re working at a much deeper level.
If you’re interested in making changes to see you feeling calmer, healthier and brighter into Autumn and beyond, I’d love to hear from you. Take a look a the Autumn Wellbeing Package here  to see if it’s for you.
Feel free to contact me to ask questions and book your place. 

Bespoke 6 week wellbeing support package:


​I don't often 'do' special offers; people generally book in to see a Medical Herbalist when they realise they need some help getting their health back on track, and they haven't managed to find that help elsewhere.  But I have noticed recently that sometimes people come for one or two consultations and then I never see them again.  I have to admit I've done a lot of soul searching about this / taken it a bit personally and worried that I was doing something wrong.  But, when I've asked for feedback I've discovered three things:

​1) It can be difficult to set up good habits, whether that be making changes to your diet or lifestyle or remembering to take your herbal medicine 3 times a day.  And if you go a couple of weeks between seeing your herbalist, and realise you haven't managed this, sometimes it seems to make sense to cancel the next appointment until you manage to make those changes / take the medicine regularly.
​2) if you don't make the changes, or take the medication regularly you might not feel any better, so decide 'its not working for you'
​3) when you booked to see a herbalist you didn't realise what the full investment (money and time) would be.

​So, I want to fix these barriers to you finding your way to better health.

I understand the enormous benefit of having someone 'in your corner', someone who will truly listen, care, and help you get to the root cause of whatever is going on with your health.  And I understand the value of both accountability and support to make changes.  I don't offer 'a magic pill to cure every ill' but I will walk with you on your journey.  I also understand that in these challenging financial times it helps if you know upfront what it's going to cost and then you can decide if its worth it.

​With all this in mind, I think it would be useful to offer a package of care alongside my 'pay as you go' consultations and for a limited time I'm offering it at a discounted rate to encourage you to consider investing in your health and wellbeing.

​Tailored to your individual need, this will include an initial consultation, which typically lasts one hour.  In this appointment we will discuss why you want to consult with a Medical Herbalist and go through your entire health history to understand your story and help set your aims for treatment.  We will discuss diet and lifestyle so that we can work together to discover what will work best for you.
​Unless there is a need for further tests you will begin herbal support after this initial consultation
​Typically you will return for a follow-up consultation a week later.  This way there is no delay for you to ask questions that you may have forgotten about at your first appointment.  We can check in on how you are getting on with your herbal prescription and any dietary and lifestyle recommendations. If appropriate for your needs, we will look at you diet in more depth and after this consultation you will be sent further dietary suggestions.  Alternatively we can explore and discuss other useful self-care measures.
​The timing of your 3rd follow-up consultation will be set to suit your requirements, typically 2-3 weeks later.  We will review how you are getting on, and any further adjustments or support that might be helpful.  
​At the end of the 6 weeks you will have a further consultation to assess progress and any further recommendations.  Some patients will need ongoing care which will be discussed during this appointment and paid for on an ad-hoc basis after that.  However where possible many patients can be signed off with tools they need to carry on in good health.

​For January I am offering a reduced rate of £148 for this package, which includes 4 consultations, recommendations and 6 weeks of herbal prescriptions.

​Vouchers are available if you want to drop heavy hints before Christmas!

​Whilst I pride myself on having a strong understanding of the science behind herbal medicine (I have a BSc degree in Phytotherapy, which includes study of the medical sciences such as Anatomy and Physiology, Biochemistry, Differential Diagnosis, Medicine, Pathology and Pharmacology as well as Botany and Herbal Materia Medica) there is something deliciously ‘witchy’ about making your own medicines.  Particularly if you do this with plants you have either grown yourself or foraged.  This can be as simple as picking a few fresh leaves of Lemon Balm to make a tea to ease a headache, throwing a handful of chamomile into a bath to calm a fractious child before bedtime or making tinctures (alcoholic extraction of herbs) and herb syrups.
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At this time of year I tend to spend a lot of time peering into bushes and trees, looking for berries and hips at their perfect moment of ripeness and I did struggle to contain my excitement on the school run when I spotted some elderberries finally ready for me to steal (ahem) forage.  I am always mindful not to overharvest when foraging, all berries are primarily over-winter food for birds; therefore I never take all the berries off a tree, only taking those that are easy to reach, leaving those higher up for our feathered friends. Once the kids were dropped off at school I was straight back with my basket to collect enough berries to boost our immunity over the autumn and winter months.
The Elder Tree (Sambucus nigra)
The Elder has been used since ancient times for its medicinal properties. In fact it was once considered to be the "Medicine Chest Tree" as all its parts can be used to treat common ailments. Although the leaves, bark, flowers and berries were once used, it is mainly the flowers and berries that have a modern usage. This is because the bark and leaves, when used internally, are quite strong purgatives.
Elderflowers have been traditionally used for the treatment of cold and flu; when drunk hot in a tea they help you to sweat, thus reducing your temperature and sweating the infection out. They are also great for treating catarrh and hence are not only good for colds but also for hayfever and sinusitis. They also be made into delicious Elderflower Champagne.
Elderberries have many of the same properties as the flowers, but they also contain lots of Vitamin C. They have been the subject of a lot of research which is showing that they are also active against flu viruses; they are able to stop the virus from infecting your cells as well as stopping it spreading. Hence if you take Elderberries from the start of your cold or flu you can reduce the severity and length of your illness. This is great example of how modern research is confirming what we already know from our traditional knowledge.
Folk Lore: The Elder is also known as a magical tree with a wealth of folk lore associated with it. For example there is supposed to be a spirit called Hylde-Moer or Elder-Mother who dwells within the tree and watches over it. If the tree is cut down without the permission of Hyle-Moer, she is said to haunt those who do so. Hence before making a cut it is traditional to say: "Elder Mother, give me some of your wood and I will give thee some of mine when it grows in the forest". If you don't, well you have been warned!
Once I’d harvested sufficient berries I returned home to rinse them in some cold water to take off any dirt and removed them from the stalks (any stalks left in the mix would make it taste quite bitter) and then I was ready to make my favourite immune tonic.
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Elderberry Syrup Recipe:
Put your berries into a pan and add just enough water to cover the bottom of the pan. Bring them slowly to the boil and simmer for about 20 minutes with the lid on until they have released their juice.
Once cool, pour the juice and berries through some muslin into a bowl. Wearing rubber gloves squeeze the rest of the juice from the berries.
Measure how much juice you have and for every 500ml of juice, add 500g of sugar, 20 cloves, 1 stick of cinnamon, 2 star anise and 1 inch cube of chopped fresh ginger.  (I also often add half a liquorice stick to this mix)
Heat gently while the sugar dissolves then bring to the boil and simmer hard for 5 minutes.
Strain through a sieve and allow to cool a bit before putting into clean bottles. Keep shaking the bottles every 10 minutes as the syrup cools, don’t forget to label your bottles. If refrigerated the syrup will keep for six months (that’s if it lasts that long!)
I didn’t just add the spices for their flavour they also add to the syrups medicinal action.
Cinnamon (Cinnamomum zeylanicum) is a warming antimicrobial, antiviral and antibacterial.  It is also a useful expectorant (i.e. it supports the body in the removal of excess amounts of mucus from the respiratory system).
Cloves (Eugenia caryophyllus) are a powerful antiseptic and mild anaesthetic.
Ginger (Zingiber officinale) can be used for many different complaints during an upper respiratory system infection- it is diffusive and stimulating and is perfect for getting stuck mucus flowing again. A strong ginger tea can relieve congested coughs and stuffy sinuses.  It’s also antimicrobial, helping to prevent further infection.
Star anise (Illicium verum) is used as a stimulant and expectorant. It is commonly used to flavour cough mixtures and pastilles. It has also been used as a source of shikimic acid, a primary precursor in the production of anti-influenza drugs such as Tamiflu.
Liquorice (Glycyrrhiza glabra)  is a sweet demulcent that soothes mucous membranes; If I have a scratchy sore throat, liquorice tea is often the first thing I reach for. The sweet taste and thick consistency of liquorice root seems to magically erase dry and irritated sore throats. Besides soothing sore throats, liquorice is famously used as a pectoral herb. It soothes coughs, especially those dry and irritating coughs that can keep you up all night. Since sore throats and coughs tend to come together this is a wonderful herb to reach for. Add to that its antiviral and antibacterial properties and you’ve got a useful herb for common upper respiratory infections.
As mentioned its best to keep this syrup in the fridge, where it should last at least 6 months.  It can be taken by itself or I also combine it with tinctures such as Echinacea or Wild Indigo.
I’m going to be sharing some more recipes over the next few weeks.  Do follow my blog if you think you’d be interested.  Looking at my front garden I think the next one will be Hyssop Oxymel – for colds, flu and bronchitis.

For more information about my work as a Medical Herbalist, or if you are interested in whether a consultation could help you have a look at my website
www.bespokebotanicals.co.uk
 
Disclaimer: All information given above is for educational purposes and is not intended to replace advice from a health care professional.  If you have any health problems or are taking any other medication, herbs or supplements always seek the advice of a qualified medical herbalist or other healthcare practitioner prior to starting any new treatments